.quiet moments.

In the final few moments before we become a family of three, I sometimes like to steal myself away for a few quiet moments alone.

Moments that I talk to myself. I tell myself that things will be okay. And that I can do this. That I am strong and capable of handling all these new changes. To remind myself that my husband loves me unconditionally. To remind myself that my true friends will support me and be around during this crazy life changing event. I tell myself that I am not alone. And to relax. Slow down. Appreciate the beauty of life. And appreciate all that I have and all that is coming.

Moments that I talk to my baby. And I tell it how much we love it already. How we will all learn and grow together. I play it my favorite music. I play it Peter's favorite music. I rub it and massage it tenderly. I sing it songs so that it will know my voice. I feel it kick. I tell it of all our adventures we will have together. How we will travel. How we will play. How we will become this wonderful little family. And I tell it that everything will be okay. We will all be okay, our family of three.

Moments that I think of my husband. I think of how proud I am of the man he has become. How we works so hard for us to live comfortably. I think of how he worries about us in his own little way and of how I want to comfort him in those times. Tell him how much I love him. And how that love grows so much when I see him interact with our baby still nuzzled in my belly. I think of how it melts my heart when he whispers to my belly. When he rubs my belly. When he kisses my belly. I think of how he will make a truly great father. And how our little baby is going to love him so very much. I think of how they will play. How he will teach our child to ski and skate and laugh. And perhaps speak polish. I think of how he will love our baby unconditionally. And I feel so grateful that he chose me to do this with.

Moments that I think of our family. And how much love this baby has brought to them already. How both our mother's [aka. baby t's grandmother's] voices crack when they speak of meeting the little one or how their eyes fill up with tears of joy at the thought of meeting our new mini family member. I think of our babe's grandfathers [lucky little peanut gets 3!] and how they are each prepping to love it in their own ways. And of all the activities I can already see those old guys brewing up to do with our little babe. Skiing. Horseback riding. Catching Goldfish. Building Cars. Then I think of baby t's auntie and how much she is going to spoil it rotten, in both toys and love. And how she is almost just as nervous as I am about having a baby around. I also think of all of baby t's uncles who seem both relaxed and indifferent about having a baby around, but still so excited to meet it. I then remind myself that Peter and I have this amazing support system around us, that at times, can be filled with so much love it's overwhelming. I tell myself to appreciate it. To welcome it. And I remind myself that it's okay to ask for help, and accept that help with open arms because they all want to be a part of our new crazy life too.